Old-West Cowboy Slang

How well do you know your cowboy phraseology? Quiz yourself, cowpoke...

1. What does it mean to "throw up the sponge"?

Who lives in a wagon-town under the sea?

A. Give yer horse a good washin'

B. Surrender to yer enemy
C. Celebrate a gun-slingin' victory

D. Forgo contraception

Answer: B. Don't throw up that sponge unless you want folks to think of you as a yellow-bellied coward. And always use protection.

2. Which of these phrases didn't mean "alcohol" in the Old West?

A jug of moonshine, sir

A. Kansas Sheep Dip
B. Tarantula Juice

C. Tongue Oil

D. Holster Brine

Answer: D...I made that one up, although it sounds pretty authentic, if I do say so myself. Other popular phrases for alcohol included Coffin Varnish, Firewater, Taos Lightning, Nose Paint, Rookus Juice, Family Disturbance, John Barleycorn (beer), Joy Juice, Bug Juice, Oh-be-joyful, Apple Jack, Valley Tan, Forty Rod, and Bottled Courage.

3. If you're "worse than a cat in a roomful of rockers," how are you feeling?

No, you can't has cheezburger.

A. Nervous as all get-out

B. Angrier than a sheep herder with a saddle rash

C. Hungry as a horse

D. Clumsy as a drunken mule

Answer: A. I guess I would be nervous too, if I had a tail prone to getting crushed under rocking chairs.

4. It's late at night and you're "stringing a whizzer." What are you doing in there, young man?!

I don't wanna go blind!

A. Making use of the old-timey outhouse
B. Telling a tall tale

C. Lassoing a young pig

D. Skinning a cow hide

Answer: B. Anti-climactic, huh?

5. Which of these fine ladies would you not expect to see in the town whorehouse?

I'm wearing 34 sexy layers.

A. A slommack
B. A nymph du prairie
C. A dough puncher
D. A calico queen


Answer: C. The Dough Puncher was the camp cook, the others are all various "painted lady" references.


For more cowboy slang, check out Legends of America.